infinite hope, Martin Luther King, mental health, Newton Connecticut, school shooting

Crashing From the High Point of the Season’s Spirit


I know there is a saying that what goes up must come down, but did we have to go from last week’s feel good of Santa surrounded by miracles to shooting first graders in Newton, Connecticut?  How do we attribute this to any one factor?  Guns are available.  People are deranged and have unmet metal health issues.
We, as a society, can and must do better.  Yet it feels almost hopeless.  I feel for all those families with Christmas around the corner and suddenly missing a kid with whom to celebrate.  I’m torn.  I hear those who cry out against gun control saying the guns are merely the tool of the crazy in this instance.  
I see article like http://now.msn.com/i-am-adam-lanzas-mother-says-mom-of-mentally-ill-son#scptmfs.  Then I see the counters looking at the mother’s blog quoting parts where she sounds crazy.  Is that a counter, there is a second person in need of therapy if one wants to short circuit the building violence?
So is the problem the guns or the mentally ill?  Why do we think the problem will be solved with only addressing one?   I can only hope there is some end to our folly.  If Germany can go an entire year with police only firing 85 bullets with 49 of them being warning shots, surely human kind is capable of less killing.  So there is cause for hope…I guess.
As a side note, this story was the first news story which triggered an emotional response strong enough to throw my MS out of whack.  Maybe it is just the timing with Christmas, family coming to town, and a boat load of work to be done for my job, but since this story broke Friday, I have had a decided uptick in pain and a much harder time focusing on any task.  I keep asking myself “What if I’m crazy?  What if one of my kids is?”  Heck, I had to pull one out of the dryer yesterday only to be told they both climbed in there from time to time and shut the door for the other because “it’s neat, fun and scary” (told between gales of laughter).
“We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope”. – Martin Luther King, Jr. 
I’m trying, and life’s trying me.
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Christmas spirit, Christmas story, medically fragile, santa

Santa Surrounded by Miracles

 I had thought I would write this week about how hard it is to spend weeks where everyday is spent in a muddle of discomfort.  I still find it easy to meet people, but it’s difficult to relate sometimes.  Still, it’s hard to find any such negative emotions in light of the Christmas party we attended on Saturday.  Maybe that’s the best Christmas present I get this year.  I’d be hard pressed to think of a present my kids could give me worth more than that mornings memories and images.

Our kids all went to sit on Santa’s lap as he came to visit medically fragile kids who have been foster care through Mentor.  Above are O and A with Santa.  Below is K who was in complete sensory overload with all of the kids and sounds.

So many of our creations seem to reflect us.  O and I made this ornament.  He named it O and the story is he wants to be a real boy.  Funny, sometimes I want to be a real boy too.

A had a ball pushing K around “seeing” other kids, some of whom she knew from their spending time with us.  I suspect it’s one of the times they felt most “like” the rest of the crowd.

I loved seeing this little girl whom we’ve know for years getting her face painted.  She was so proud of her Santa face paint “costume.”  For a little girl thought to be on death’s door multiple times, seeing her happy, proud and having fun was priceless.
Even with my A and K staying out of the picture dealing with sensory overload reactions, I think this is my favorite picture from the event.  It’s a picture where everyone in it has an amazing story.  It’s a picture of Santa surrounded by miracles as everyone with Santa has come through medically fragile foster care.  It’s a visual of Christmas spirit as I imagine it.

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