Category Archives: Plato

family impact, introspection, memory, Plato, running

Eyes Wide Open

I know in therapy the point of resistance is the point which most needs to be explored. As I think about MS and its impact on me, my family and our relationships, I find myself more drawn towards the approach I tell my son when he playfully tries to hit me.  He misses, and I remind him, “the way to confront strength is not to be where it is being applied.”

As MS pain gets worse, as my mind gets more forgetful, I find myself retreating to the land of “look as I train to try and run my first half marathon.”   Perhaps, MS isn’t hurting me so bad these days.   
Some days I find my defensive self wanting to point out as J calls me frustrated wondering where I am, when I was supposed to be home by 9am.  I answer, talking to her on the corner across the street from our house at 9:01.  At this point, I am the one frustrated, because I understand the frustration, even if this time was a minor blip. I can understand the frustration when I ask her for the 4th time whether anything is planned for tomorrow.  I live and die by the schedule and alarm on my phone, and I hate my need to keep checking.

Maybe, this is why therapy isn’t done solo ? Maybe I just need a reason to open my eyes this wide. 


Otherwise, I will continue to look for the fronts I feel comfortable confronting my MS.  I can’t honestly say which approach is correct because the line between acknowledging MS and allowing its impact to destroy any sense of self reliance seems so thin. 

Introspection hasn’t been the in thing for psychoanalysis for centuries, but I find going back to Plato for inspiration on how to think is fairly sound.  After all, he said, “…why should we not calmly and patiently review our own thoughts, and thoroughly examine and see what these appearances in us really are?”

This still doesn’t get me past the resistance my mind encounters, but maybe today is one when I will just move on within my illusory reality hoping reality will conform.

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Allegory of the Cave, Lemmings, Miracles, Plato

Thought on Plato

Some random thoughts I’ve had in the past few weeks which I’ve meant to get up here:

I was thinking about Plato’s Allegory of the Cave in terms of what it means to be a parent. What if all of parenthood when boiled down to its essence is little more than an attempt to build a better mirror rather than a wall thus allowing our kids a “better” vision of the world and their place with in it. After all, the one who has been out in the world can’t drag the rest of the cave dwelling people out, so what can they do? Maybe “better” is one that lets them see more truly the nature of the world around their existence so that the people may more truly see their surroundings. Maybe “better” is a mirror thinning them down or building them up as their esteem needs. Personally, I think “better” may be summed up simply as “able to make a better mirror that the next may see more clearly.”

Of course this is how I define progress. It’s not just how much have I done, seen or learned. If I am unable to allow anybody else to share in the experience, who cares? If I take 3 steps forward, and my family and friends take only 2 which is the greater accomplishment, which measure is best used to define me? I tend to be more proud of our family taking 2 steps, and it’s upon that scale I’d prefer to be judged.

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This Lemmings Explanation for Miracles
A deranged miracle said unto the Universe
“I is what I is
and I be what I be
so leave I to were alone.”

The Universe notes,
“I see now why miracles don’t travel in packs.
Good thing.
Makes keeping order far easier.”

To which Alternate Universe replied,
“True, even lemmings who would choose to follow
would constantly have to check their bearings
forever questioning what it means to ‘are.'”

Universe ponders aloud,
“Change him back and undo all he has wrought?”

Alternate Universe:
“Leave it to me.”

This Lemming longs to know,
“What are my reality?”

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